Dreaming

Photo taken by a woman with recurrent clinical depression. She is trying to work her way out of a severe episode.

About this photo: I have been depressed for a long time, severely depressed for several years to the point of barely functioning. It makes it very difficult to leave my home. I have committed to getting better for my husband and toddler, so I left the house yesterday to visit one of my doctors who is hard for me to get to. I don’t drive, so while sitting in the passenger seat I kept taking photos. It is something that calms me, in addition to Xanax. Along the way, I captured some interesting cityscapes and added dreamy effects. Looking back at the photos, it makes me sad that I feel so far away from that world, but on a positive note it makes me want to be able to be out in the world again more, living life, for both myself and my family.

Right now, I feel like I am still seeing the world from behind a barrier, as in this photo, but trying to hold onto that dream of being on the other side, present, and enjoying life. A dream I hope I can make come true, with the help of my medicine and doctors, and hopefully something in me. 

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12 thoughts on “Dreaming

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  1. She’s very articulate considering how depressed she is. It always amazes me that a person can be virtually catatonic all day and yet express themselves so clearly… I don’t know about you or anyone else, but when I’ve gone really manic I get to the stage where people seem to have great difficulty following quite a lot of what I say, in speech or writing. Yet nothing equivalent ever happens in depression. I find that weird…

    And I love her photo by the way 🙂

    Like

  2. You will get there and the fact that you can see “the other side” gives you the goal and inspiration you need to recover. Well done for getting out, that must have been a big hurdle for you and you should be very proud of yourself 🙂

    Like

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