Broken Light: A Photography Collective

We are photographers living with or affected by mental illness; supporting each other one photograph at a time. Join our community, submit today!

The Endless Night

Photo taken by contributor Danielle, a woman who suffers from clinical depression and insomnia.

About this photo: “The nights are the hardest. I lie in the dark praying for an end. An end to the thoughts. An end to the pain. An end to the night. Anything. I try to keep my eyes shut, but I can’t escape the thoughts banging around the padded cell of my mind. On for hours and hours. I feel like I’m losing it. Losing touch with my one toe left submerged in the waters of reality. 

I can’t lie still no matter what I try. My body, revved and agitated, feels like it’s exploding beneath my skin. So I get up. I take photos. Hundreds of photos, of just one thing. This time it’s a clock’s irritatingly bright light. A light that’s screaming at me through the darkness of an endless night. 12:33? 2:33? It’s all a blur. An overwhelming blur. But somehow my lens has taken it’s power away. My lens has taken something evil, something that feels like it’s controlling me, and has broken it down to light and dark, and turned it into art. The clock is just a picture now. The clock is just a clock.

My eyes close. A few hours of spotty sleep and nightmares later, light spills across my room. Photography once again has gotten me through the night, and allowed me to live to see another day. I am grateful and disappointed at the same time.” 

_____

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3 comments on “The Endless Night

  1. halfmanhalfblogger
    March 19, 2013

    My good heavens, I am speechless it hits home but also more detailed then my feelings them self. It could not have been said better. Great job, you are an inspiration to new young bloggers like myself. A word press role model if you will. .

    Like

  2. pawsitiveHeather
    March 19, 2013

    Wow… so similar the feelings I have every night, every morning.

    Like

  3. Cara Lockhart Smith
    March 21, 2013

    The night isn’t endless. And the photograph is amazing.

    Like

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