Please welcome first-time contributor Alyssa, a 23-year-old woman from Michigan who has a BFA with an emphasis in photography from Northern Michigan University. Her fine art reflects controversial and personal subjects. She was diagnosed with general anxiety at the age of 10. She then went through a depressive state between 20-22 years old. Her anxiety is still is an issue today but she has learned to see life in a better way.
About this photo: “This photo is from a series I did over the last few years while struggling with depression and anxiety. Hopeless and uncertain about my identity, I struggled in silence. I began to direct my thoughts into a journal. The series of images and corresponding journal entries that emerged, document my past two years and how I felt during each entry. The work is my way of officially closing the door on my past.
The following text accompanied the above photo…
April 2014: I tend to live my life with my eyes half open, my heart half closed, and my brain half dead. I will avoid the tough situations. I will leave an option open, always just for back up. I choose to not choose. And I ignore the positive. It’s a damn blessing I have made it this far in life. I put myself into places I want out of, but am afraid to leave. I’m cursed with a constant monologue streaming in my head. I get nervous about things normal people would be excited about. I throw all this shit on paper for what? For the purpose of looking back on this a few years from now and still thinking I’m fucked in the head?”
Find more from Alyssa at her website.
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Great picture.. I also like what you wrote. I feel sometimes i battle with identity. And when I look in the mirror I hate what I see, I don’t recognize me. And I wonder if I ever did, or if this is new.
I love that there are people who have brought their issues in the arts, so that people like me can find some sort of voice for what’s going on. So Thank you. It’s a great picture..
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struggling with self identity is difficult. You have shared your thoughts in art and word very well. Thank you for this photograph.
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